Totally freaking out, I turn 40 in a couple of months.
All my girlfriends and Hubbys are going away for my 40th to Queenstown, now that is going to be drunken debauchery.
All my friends 40th’s are coming up , I have a big one this weekend , they are big drinkers,super fun, and crazy. Like me, like I was, how am I gonna go unnoticed? I’m not really ready to tell people I’m not drinking…ever.
I’ve already seen posts up on FB of champagne breakfasts, I’m so bloody nervous.
That’s how the last couple of months have gotten me to this point, I was starting to become really nervous about drinking, I never knew what was gonna happen , how smashed id get. What I’d say to my husband, would we get in another arguement about my drinking? He also is one of those people , sometimes he will have 3 beers then leave it a week . I wish I was one of them.
But No, I am not. Everyday about 4 o’clock was a special occasion. If I’d had an awesome day with the kids, I’d drink. If it was a bad day I’d drink. If friends were coming over, if they weren’t I’d drink. If My kitchen rules was on tv ,
Fuck any occasion , I’d drink!
I always thought it was the ciggies that was the problem,yes I smoke too. But I ain’t giving that up just yet too. I’d think I would feel like shit the next day coz I smoked too many fags, which I did. But wine made me smoke more, smoking wasn’t making me do embarrassing, shameful things. Regretting shit I’d said or done the night before. Smoking wasn’t getting me wasted, Smoking wasn’t ruining my life. Yeah it’s not healthy, but I’ll give that up later on.
Sober is the new black
well that’s what I’m telling myself
Laters x